Suicide was the best career move Kurt Cobain ever made.
Want to be famous for centuries to come? Forget being good at anything because you are probably a useless piece of crap. Just do what all the greats did and kill yourself!
Think about it: Sylvia Plath, Vincent Van Gogh, and Kurt Cobain... all of them sucked at what they did, but they are thought of as revolutionaries in their feilds. Now, I know that people are going to bitch at me for saying Cobain sucks, but come on ... Smells Like Teen Spirit is probably one of the worst songs of the century. Just to prove my point, here is a little sample of the extremely meaningful lyrics:
"A mulatto
An albino
A mosquito
My libido
Yea"
And then he says "hello" about 500 times. The song sucks ... just deal with it. You all know that if Cobain hadn't killed himself, he'd be doing infomercials for the DeliPRO knife just to keep his heroin addiction alive.
Incidentally, you can buy the wonderful DeliPRO knife from my website for only 15.99 + shipping. So, you can write a bunch of silly poetry and use it to kill youself. 10 out of 10 corpses gave it a thumbs up after I went around and stole all of their thumbs.
It can cut through your skin in less than 3 minutes! Just imagine that tomato is your wrist and you'll figure it out.
I think Kurt Cobain's ghost is going to haunt me tonight. jeremiah@yourapathy.net
© 2004-2005 by Jeremiah
I am probably dead by now, so don't bother emailing.
This stuff is going to be famous.